Eating Apples with God

{a new poem}

I drop anchor
below the roiling surface
of expectations and explanations,
answer​ing the call
to quiet the mind,
to wade into the darker
waters of the heart
where truth lives
and awaits my return.

Here, I find God –
if God and truth are one.

Over here, God waves me over.
You could have come sooner,
and more often
I am sorry, I say.
I kept myself so busy.

Does God long for us
the way we long for God?
Does God fear us
the way we fear God?
Does God doubt us
the way we doubt God?
Does God wonder
where we are
the way we wonder
where God is?

Here, instead of hiding,
I reveal myself.
But God is never surprised.

I knew all along,
God says
as I stand so exposed,
sure I will be cast out​ again.

Stay, God beckons.
polishing an apple
against their t-shirt.
I pluck one for myself
from a low-hanging branch.

Together, we sit in silence – 
the tart and sweet, the crunch,
the juice, the falling leaves.

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